Why White People Are Aliens!

Okay, this may sound pretty crazy for a blog about history, BUT WAIT!

I'm going to go through some history until you can agree with me that white people are aliens.

Let's look at non-white societies first. When I say non-white societies I am referring to societies that were completely uninfluenced by Europeans. Because the Europeans are strange creatures that I will get to later.

There was Mesopotamia, a wonderful area between the Tigris and Euphrates rivers that was used primarily for farming. These people lived off of the land and had no society-ending issues, like, ever. Their society collapsed because nomads came in and took over. Nomads were travelling groups of people that often end their travelling by destroying a city and staying there. The key difference between them and traditional European whites is that they are satisfied once they no longer have to wander.

Things were pretty stable in America, since both continents were completely separate from everything that was ever going on in Europe. There were the Mayans, Incas, and Aztecs, who had crazy rituals and their leaders were generally despised by the whole population. Despite that minor issue, their societies survived for long amounts of time and empires fell from one to the other without repercussion. And there were still Native American "Indians" who lived in what is now North America. They didn't have any written language so there isn't any strong proof about what they did, but there are some crucial facts I'll bring up. They lived in small communities and hunted/gathered or farmed, depending on which area they lived in. Most importantly, they lived off the land but they didn't claim to own it. People lived with the land and shared it because they realized something important. Human beings are temporary and the Earth is pretty permanent, so we should consider ourselves guests. More on that later.

Then there were Ancient Egyptians, people living along the Nile River because the Nile River is completely awesome. By "completely awesome," I mean that there were reliably regular, yet not dangerous flooding, which naturally irrigated the farmland around it. Oh and they built a couple of these!

They lived for 2,500 years under God-like Pharaohs, and due to the completely awesome Nile they were set to live there forever. UNTIL...

Since Egypt was such a powerful society at this point, they were able to communicate with whatever else was going on at that time. This ability was very rare, and most of the human race were simply just doing their own thing at this time anyway. But a pharaoh named Hatshepsut decided to change things forever by opening up trade. How does that relate to white people? Just wait, me!

Hatshepsuts fatal decision ended the thousands of years of isolationism that Egypt was so good at. They used the Nile for everything and never felt the need to go or do anything else. Once Hatshepsut decided to interact with other societies, they were attacked by other societies, most notably Alexander the Great and the Romans.

We're white! All of us!

The Roman Empire was magnificent and contributed impressive feats of art, architecture and science. But their fault was that they got too lazy and greedy. In the coliseum, audiences paid to watch animals and men be slaughtered. These audience members also went home and celebrated great wealth and abundance to a horrible degree. There was a common trend in which people would eat a massive feast, then throw it all up so they could eat another feast. Their laziness and the empires unmanageable size led to German tribes breaking in and taking over. But why did they become this lazy? Because they're aliens? If you say so, me!

White people have a specific trait that no other race of humans contain. The only other race to travel the world were Asians like Zheng He who traveled the world in search of trade. The Silk Road was a giant system of trade across both Europe and Asia, but people never actually traveled the entire road. The goods traveled from merchant to merchant. No, the only travelers who travel in the desire of exploring the world were primarily... you know

 White people have this urge to leave that is not like any other race. They become bored with the life they have and strive to find some new exciting place. But they didn't realize that you will never be satisfied unless you find that excitement within yourself. Emerson said it best when he said "nothing is at last sacred but the integrity of your own mind."

Strong advice from a remarkably white man

    And we're still not satisfied! The explorers found the new world, inhabited it and utilized every possible opportunity given by the nature around us. And yet now we hate nature. The modern man is one who hides inside his house when it's too hot or cold. The modern man travels by flat roads to perfectly designed buildings to earn imaginary value to pay for the neverending need for satisfaction. The fastest cars, the biggest houses, the fanciest clothes, and the newest technology. And it's all because of one group of people that thought they could venture the world, exploring for a land of happiness and satisfaction because they couldn't find it at home. They are tearing the world apart in their unceasing exploration of contentment. Every other society worked with nature, because they belonged here. The race that was not meant for Earth must be the one that searched all over for contentment and, in not finding it, made their own.

You know...